


it’s crazy that you’re moving on so fast (but baby, it’s okay if i am still the best you had)

by gilligankane



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-02
Updated: 2018-04-02
Packaged: 2019-04-17 07:33:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14184039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gilligankane/pseuds/gilligankane
Summary: “I’m not wrong,” Charity says defensively. “She’s been in every other night with someone different. Flaunting it, isn’t she?”“Flaunting what?” Chas asks.Charity pauses, her eyes narrowing. “Nothing.”





	it’s crazy that you’re moving on so fast (but baby, it’s okay if i am still the best you had)

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [been using bodies just to get me through](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14252775) by [gilligankane](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gilligankane/pseuds/gilligankane). 



> A very special thank you to thegirl20 for looking this over and reassuring me it's not the absolute worst. And for helping with all those pesky Britishisms that escape me.
> 
> Set a few weeks after December 21, 2017 (the 'we're not a proper couple' chat) and what could possibly happen. A companion to 'been using bodies just to get me through'.

“Another one, yeah?” Chas asks as Vanessa eases up to the bar, her elbows resting on the top.

Charity snorts softly, scribbling another letter into her crossword. She’s not on tonight, but Noah is at an overnight, Moses is with Ross, and Vanessa is…

Vanessa is picking up a beer mat next to Charity has her crossword, thumbing the edge of it as she hums under her breath. Charity’s pen pauses on the newsprint, mesmerized by the way Vanessa’s fingers twist and turn, sliding the cardboard mat between them. She’s so caught up in the way they move, remembering them twisting and turning in the fabric of her shirt, catching on the zip of Charity’s shirt in the drafty cellar, that she misses Vanessa’s answer and only hears Chas’s small noise of surprise.

“So this one is promising?” Chas asks, already pulling a new pint.

Charity’s head snaps up. She winces as the muscles in her neck pull and hides the pain by tipping her head to the side. “What’s that now?”

Vanessa shrugs one shoulder, biting down on her bottom lip. She looks up at Charity through her eyelashes. “She’s… something.”

“Fit,” Chas says. She looks over Vanessa’s shoulder at the redhead sitting in the corner booth, waiting for Vanessa to come back over. “But so was that one Tracy set you up with.”

“Amanda,” Charity says quickly. She rolls her eyes when Vanessa and Chas both turn to her in surprise. “Well, I pay attention, don’t I?”

“Coulda fooled me,” Vanessa murmurs. She looks back at Chas. “She’s funny,” she finally says.

Chas smiles and places two pints down in front of Vanessa. “Whatever she is, I’m glad she’s getting a second drink.”

Vanessa’s cheeks flush as she drops the beer mat and wraps her hands around the glasses. “Don’t say it like that.”

“Like what, babe?” Charity asks, finding her voice. “Like you haven’t been in here every other night with a different woman?”

Vanessa’s eyes harden, her lips pursing. “Right, then.” She picks up the pints and spins neatly on her heel, marching back to the table and dropping a pint in front of the redhead. She slides into the seat across from her, eyes straying back to the bar and finding Charity’s for a moment before she looks back at her date, her hand resting on the table, fingers just brushing the redhead’s wrist. 

Chas sighs heavily, tapping her fingers against the bartop. Charity looks back down at her crossword, but the printed black letters swim in front of her eyes. Chas sighs again and Charity bristles, dropping her pen.

“Well? Spit it out.”

Chas glares at her. “Was that necessary?”

“I’m not wrong,” Charity says defensively. “She’s been in every other night with someone different. Flaunting it, isn’t she?”

“Flaunting what?” Chas asks.

Charity pauses, her eyes narrowing. “Nothing.”

Chas rolls her eyes. “Nothing. Right. If you’re going to be a moody cow, can you do it somewhere else? I’m running a pub, here.”

“Moody cow,” Charity sputters. 

“If you wanted her-”

Charity sits up a little straighter. “Whoa, babe. Who said anything about wanting her?”

Chas lifts an eyebrow, staring at Charity, unimpressed. “You, every time you sit here on your days off,” she adds. “And stare at her while she’s on her date.”

“I’m looking out for her,” Charity defends, the words weak. “I mean, Daz is one thing, but do you know any of these women?”

Chas takes a sip of her water. “I set her up with the one before the last. Jenna. Met her in town at the wholesaler.”

Charity’s mouth falls open slowly before she remembers herself and presses her lips together, eyes narrowing. “You what?”

Chas shrugs. “I thought it didn’t bother you.”

“It doesn’t,” Charity says quickly.

“Sure it doesn’t, babe.” Chas picks up a cloth and runs it across the top of the bar, looking at Vanessa and her date. “They’re cute together, aren’t they.”

“Robert thinks Ness and I look cute together,” Charity says, immediately wishing she could take back the words. Her mouth doesn’t listen, though, spitting out more. “Ross, too.”

“But you aren’t together,” Chas says lightly. “Just a bit of fun, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Charity echoes absently, looking at Vanessa. Their eyes meet briefly before Vanessa’s date says something, pulling Vanessa’s attention away.

“Not like you’re suddenly a couple,” Chas continues.

“Right,” Charity breathes out. She frowns. “What did you say?”

Chas shrugs a shoulder and catches Jimmy’s eye, heading in his direction.

Charity looks back at Vanessa. Her hair is pin-straight, parted in the middle, and tucked behind one ear - just like it was the afternoon Paddy caught them in the Woolpack after Charity told Veronica off. Charity remembers brushing Vanessa’s hair behind her shoulder, kissing a line up Vanessa’s neck while Vanessa fumbled with the zip on Charity’s shirt. She remembers backing Vanessa up against the chair, their bodies toppling over as they giggled and pulled at each other.

_ It’s not like we’re suddenly a couple _ , Vanessa had said - had dared. 

_ Don’t flatter yourself. Couple weeks an’ I’ll be bored of you _ , Charity had said, the words feeling heavy in her mouth. 

Something had passed over Vanessa’s face then, something like disappointment and pain. Charity ignored it, scoffing to hide the way her stomach clenched tight as she realized that  _ no _ , they weren’t actually a couple; as she realized maybe she might want them to be. 

Vanessa had been in the pub the next night - a second run at Amanda, Tracy’s accountant. Charity had broken two pints, barred Jimmy for the night, and left her shift twenty minutes early to eat crisps in the cellar and debate about burning that old couch. When she came back up, Chas was livid and Vanessa was sitting alone at a table, nursing a second pint. 

After that, it’s been a parade of women Charity has never met before, slipping into the village for a drink with Vanessa. Charity has been behind the bar for every single one of them, making notes on why they’re not enough - not pretty or smart or funny. Each time, Vanessa waved goodbye after one pint, shaking her head at Chas’s silent question, and slipping out into the night before Charity could catch her eye. 

Tonight, though, she asked for a second pint. And Charity doesn’t want to know why it causes her chest to tighten and her head to pound like she’s waking up in the cellar with a whisky bottle in one hand and Vanessa at her back.

“Are you on?”

Charity blinks, looking up to meet Vanessa’s eyes. “What?”

“Are you working?” Vanessa repeats. “Can you pull me a pint?”

“Where’s Chas?”

Vanessa looks around the bar. “I’ve not seen her.”

Charity sighs and takes Vanessa’s glass from her

“Oi,” Gerry says, lifting his glass into the air. “Can I get a second.”

“Does it look like I’m working?” Charity snaps.

Gerry sits back in his seat a little. “Well, yeah.”

“Well, I ain’t,” Charity says. She glares at him before pulling Vanessa a pint and putting it down on the bar. “Right. There you go.”

“Charity,” Vanessa says softly. 

Charity forces herself to smile. “What, babe?” When Vanessa doesn’t speak up right away, Charity nods in the direction of the redhead. “Don’t want to leave a lady waiting, do you?”

Vanessa’s shoulders slump. “Fine,” she mutters. She takes her pint and turns, storming forward before she spins back suddenly, her eyes burning. “You know, you’re a right idiot, Charity Dingle.”

“Excuse me?” Charity sputters. “ _ I’m _ -”

“You sit here every night and moon across the pub like I ran over over your dog,” Vanessa says, clenching her hand into a fist. “Making me feel like I’m… like I’m  _ two-timing  _ ya.”

Charity snorts, ignoring the soft flop in the pit of her stomach. “You can’t be two-timing me if we’re not a proper couple.”

“ _ You _ don’t want to be a proper couple, but-”

“But  _ what _ , Vanessa?” Charity asks, leaning closer. Her voice is low, but harsh. She runs a hand up and down the length of her own body. “Want this to yourself, do you?”

“What do  _ you _ want?” Vanessa pleads.

Charity blinks a few times, a hundred answers racing through her mind and across the tip of her tongue before she speaks. “I don’t know,” she admits.

Vanessa opens her mouth but it snaps shut as the redhead steps in close. From here, Charity can see the woman’s hand at the small of Vanessa’s back. Charity flinches. She’s traced that same place before, her fingertips dancing across the soft skin under Vanessa’s light blue top. 

“I changed my mind about that third drink,” the woman says. “Why don’t we have it somewhere more… private?” Her eyes stray to Charity.

Vanessa keeps staring at Charity, her eyes daring Charity to say something, anything. When Charity barely blinks, Vanessa plasters on a smile and turns, her hand curling around the other woman’s arm. “Sounds lovely. I’ll grab my coat.”

Charity grinds her back teeth together, grinning like a feral cat at the two of them. “Just be careful of prying eyes, eh? Wouldn’t want the whole village putting their neb in your business.”

Vanessa shakes her head softly, pulling her coat on slowly. She lays a few notes on the bar, sliding them towards Charity. “Keep the change,” she murmurs.

“Don’t do me any favors,” Charity mumbles back, scooping the notes up and tossing them into the till without counting them. She turns around as the door closes behind Vanessa and her date, scowling down at her crossword puzzle. She looks up and finds Chas standing in the corridor, arms crossed over her chest. “Oh, come off it,” Charity says, rolling her eyes.

Chas shrugs. “For the record, I agree with Robert and Ross. You two look cute together. And you’d make a right proper couple.” She squeezes Charity’s arm softly. “Maybe tomorrow you can just tell her that, yeah?”

Charity narrows her eyes. “She left with the redhead.”

Chas shrugs again. “Keeps coming back to see you, though, doesn’t she?” She presses a soft kiss to Charity’s cheek. “Just figure it out before she stops.”

Charity shakes her head and picks her crossword puzzle up again.  _ A five letter word, ‘to be filled with fear,’ _ she reads. She sighs and stencils in  _ afraid _ before she balls the newsprint up and tosses it. 


End file.
